Seedlings' wisdom on reciprocity and gifts
Written on April 17, 2025
A few days ago I was working in an organic community garden, my hands deep into the soil, planting beet seeds and day dreaming about the moment the garden would be in full bloom so I could photograph it all. Suddenly something popped into my mind. It was almost like someone was standing next to me, whispering into my ear, saying “how many times have you thought about taking photos for your own enjoyment? And how many times have you actually done it?” It stopped me in my tracks. I haven’t ‘worked’ as a photographer in over a year now and my camera has been mostly collecting dust on the shelf. I have had all this time and opportunities to photograph ‘just for me’, something I have always wanted during my career as a professional fashion photographer… Why, indeed, had I done nothing?
It was like all the seedlings and tiny sprouts in the garden were rolling their eyes at me “duh, if you want to do it, then DO it!”
First, I felt a little offensive, “I am not like you little seedlings, I need to work and pay my bills.” I could feel them roll their eyes even harder, laughing, “humans and their imaginary obligations.” I tried to come up with valid reasons for why my camera was collecting dust, but with every counter response from the seedlings, I started to understand what they meant with ‘imaginary obligations’.
The conversation went something like this:
Suus: I can’t waste my time on hobbies and activities that don’t pay the bills. I need to be an adult and take care of myself and put more time and effort into doing something about my finances.
Seedlings: look around you, no one in this garden is worried about taking care of themselves, we are taking care of each other and are therefore supported by the earth. Do you see anyone here ‘working hard’ or ‘stressing out’ in order to receive? We, flowers, vegetables, fruit, herbs, we receive as we give of ourselves, not by doing anything we don’t want to do, but by doing what comes naturally to us.
Suus: What is the point of taking photos if there is no client or purpose for it?
Seedlings: what is the point of doing anything if not for the enjoyment of the process and the journey, without focus on the destination and the outcome?
Suus: What if the photos I take are not good or spectaculair? What if it turns out I am an average photographer? I need to be good at it!
Seedlings: “What if I am not the most beautiful flower? What if other flowers are more beautiful? What if that flower attracts more bees and what if this flower receives more compliments from humans?” We would name the source of this quote, but it is impossible, because no flower would ever utter those words. Focus on uniqueness, not perfection. The way you see is not better than others, but unique to you and therefore perfect.
So yea. The seedlings had put me in a corner.
They didn’t stop there:
“You have built a fence around yourself with limiting beliefs, keeping your wildness and inspiration at bay. Your feet are stuck in quicksand of victimhood mentality where no nurturing sun rays are able to reach you through the fog of overthinking and frustration. Have a look at what you deem as important and non-important. Who has told you this? Do you agree with it? Are they truths? Allow yourself to do things for your own enjoyment. Your desires are important, not just for you but for everyone.”
I have been thinking a lot about reciprocity lately. About the interconnectedness of all life on earth and how all beings have unique gifts ánd are responsible for sharing their gifts. Like how plants photosynthesise and create oxygen, how the saliva of grazing buffalo’s makes grass grow taller, how worms eat their way through organic matter and create healthy soil. These gifts come naturally to them, it is in their blueprint, and by sharing them they bring harmony and balance to the world.
If you have been reading my other blogposts, you might remember my (very passionate) belief that it’s important for humans to return to our own nature, and thus, return to our own unique gifts, and share them freely. I believe that this will create harmony within ourselves, and therefore create harmony in the world. Plants and buffalo’s and worms do not think “will I get paid for this” or “am I using my time productively” while photosynthesising, grazing or recycling soil, so why would I ask myself these questions? Why would I deem what comes naturally to me, capturing beauty, as not important?
After my conversation with the seedlings, the answer to a question I have been asking for a long time became very clear. On the topic of reciprocity, I wanted to know what I could give back. What could I possibly give to all my brothers and sisters in the plant, animal, mineral kingdom, who give me so much? Who give me food and water, clothing, shelter, beauty and so much more? It all made sense to me in the community garden: I see the beauty in nature and I give back by sharing this. I have literally had visions and dreams of incarnating on this planet, bringing my camera with me from the nonphysical realm. A camera that captures the essence of beauty and divinity in the physical world, so people can remember and see the beauty and divinity within themselves too.
Capturing the beauty in nature is my gift, how had I not seen this as important before?
I have always disregarded expressing my creativity, solely for the act of doing so, as not important, wasting my time or even being selfish. But aren’t I selfish to not capture the beauty I see? Aren’t I selfish to not share the beauty I witness? Aren’t I selfish to not share the appreciation I feel for the beauty in this world? Appreciation and gratitude that often feels so big I am not sure my heart can hold it all, stretching and expanding it, and therefore expanding my ability to love. Why oh why have I listened to thoughts such as ‘taking pictures of flowers doesn’t pay the bills’, and making that more important than giving back to those who give me so much?
Spending time in nature always helps me return to my own nature. It becomes easier to observe and witness the parts of myself that are conditioned by society and not in alignment with my natural, wild self. In this case, beliefs about what is important and unimportant and how I am ‘allowed’ to spend my time. My teachers from the more-than-human world always remind me and guide me back to the simple laws of nature.
And while I am going through all these thought cycles, my hands still deep into the earth, I feel everyone smiling at me, the seedlings, the sun, the worms. Every time a part of me returns back to wholeness, back to my unique and authentic self. I know all my nonhuman friends are cheering, celebrating, welcoming me home. I imagine all those limiting beliefs flowing from my mind through my body and through my hands, into the soil, where the worms eat and recycle them, returning them to love, feeding the seedlings that have guided me today.
