True beauty vs. false beauty

Written on February 8, 2024 in Bali, Indonesia

I have been on a quest to find out what beauty is for a long time. How to define it. How to measure it. How to ‘get’ it. As a portrait photographer it was my job to capture the beauty in my clients. I wanted to know exactly how I could make them feel beautiful in front of my lens. But how could I do that if I didn’t even know what beauty was?

So I looked up the definition of beauty in the dictionary:

beau-ty /bjuiti/ noun:

a combination of qualities, such as shape, colour, or form, that pleases the aesthetic senses, especially the sight.

I spent countless of hours searching for ‘beauty’ on Google or Pinterest or Youtube, which showed me all the latest make-up trends, tips on how to look younger, how to improve my skin, products for shinier hair, new diet trends and work-out routines that promised the ‘perfect’ body.

All this just didn’t sit right. It didn’t feel like the answer. Even though my mind and perception also defined beauty as physical attributes, there was something in me that wasn’t happy about this conclusion.

There was a battle within me, which I know now was a result of my limited understanding at war with the truth about what beauty really is.

What was my limited understanding? What I, and every woman and human being have been told by our society: that beauty is linked to what we see. We have been thought a measuring system to judge whether something or someone is seen as ugly or beautiful. And we learn from a young age that our ‘beauty’ is linked to our worthiness, our succes in life, whether a man will ‘pick us’ or not etc.

However, this is a paradox. Because what we see, depends on our perception, it depends on which eyes we are using. The eyes of our mind? Which have been programmed and conditioned by society so we stay disconnected from our bodies, stuck in an endless cycles of hope and unworthiness and keep spending our time and salaries on expensive make-up and painful treatments? Or the eyes of our heart? Which are directly connected to our soul and to God, to the source of beauty, that accepts us just for who we are?

Thinking that beauty is defined only by what our minds perceive is an illusion.

You see, beauty falls in the same range as love, freedom, harmony, joy, peace. What do all of these virtues have in common? They are to be felt. They are matters of the heart. This is something that humans as a collective are very confused about. We think we have freedom when we land a steady job, accumulate savings, buy a house etc. But do we feel free? Free to be who we are, to follow our hearts desires, to express ourselves?

True beauty is something to be felt. It’s something that comes from within. It’s an essence that flows through every being, every creation on Earth. If we look with the right eyes, the eyes of our heart, we see beauty in everyone and everything. How do I know this? What is the source of this ‘true definition of beauty’? It’s my heart. Which is your heart. Which is God’s heart. That is my source of truth, not what I have been told, but what I feel deep within myself.

I invite you to check in with yourself, with your body, with your soul and leave your mind out of it for a bit: what feels True for you? That your beauty is defined by your weight, your skin, your size, the amount of wrinkles, the size of your butt? Or that your beauty flows from your soul as a radiating energy? That this light within you was always present, is always present, and will always be present, no matter how your soul suit looks like?

“If only I could show you your true beauty. You would never feel the false flame of insecurity again.”

-Jaiya John

See others for who they really are and see yourself for who you really are: a beautiful soul. Feel the beauty within yourself and others. Because it is there. For some people it’s deeply hidden beneath layers of insecurities, doubts, graphic projections and masks, but it’s there. Pay attention to your own judgement, to the measuring standards your mind uses to define what you see. You can let this go. You can choose to consult your heart to feel the essence of beauty.

The most beautiful souls are being called ugly. Let’s start seeing each other on soul level. If we have to measure, let’s start measuring someone’s beauty by the kindness of their words and actions. By the way they accept themselves and therefore give others the space to accept themselves. By the way they authentically express themselves and use their heart as a guiding force.

Feel the essence of beauty, which is an essence of Source/God/Universe that flows through every being in this world. Feel the sensations in your body. Feel a smile coming on your face, feel your heart expand, feel the connection between you and others. Feel the unity and connection between you and All That Is. Feel love flowing through your entire being. This is True Beauty.